what a small, sad collage of photos that is in comparison to previous some happy things posts. the reason for that is that for the most part, this week has not been a happy one. it's been a one full of stress and frustration, of long days at work, and extremely tired and energy-less nights in front of netflix. it's been a week that saw my exhaustion reach boiling point at work; saw me walk-out of a conversation with my manager, tears stinging my eyes. it was a week that started on a high, and ended on a massive low. a blow to my ego; a kick right in the pride. that's not a fun one, that.
it's been an emotionally draining week, and i'm keen to not have a repeat of that for a long time. sadly - even with a holiday on the horizon, i can't see a light at the end of the tunnel. work is busy. since my new manager and colleagues started in the last four or so months, we've quadrupled our output. for a small team, we're smashing life in the face. we're outperforming massive teams, making all the monies, signing all the campaigns. it's awesome to be awesome, but not when it comes at a loss to staff morale. our workload has quadrupled, but the team hasn't (yet, but we are hiring finally! yay!).
we've been doing the work of six or seven people, with three or four. it's been hard work. rewarding, of course. and it helps that we all love our fucking jobs. if we didn't, things would be different. if we didn't love what we were doing, we'd not be caring so much about doing it well. but we all care; we're passionate about what we do, who we do it with, and how; we give a shit about the brand we stand for.
caring about that - about doing a good job, and about completing a job and doing a good handover while i take the first holiday since the start of summer is stressing me out. waiting on other people's input before you can do your part of a combined job is hard. committing to meetings and events and other crap that don't really matter to you, but knowing that you're doing the right thing is hard. having opinions about how other people should be doing their job is hard. wondering what exactly other people are doing while you're waiting for their feedback is hard. sometimes, being passionate about something is hard.
anyway, enough about that. it's been a quiet week for me outside of work, because of all the above points, but that's not to say that there haven't been some happy things in my week. such as:
creative coffee: starbucks have gone all out this psl season, and designed special cups for autumn; i don't even like psl, finding it much too sweet for my delicate palette, but i do love me a bit of an adult colouring-in competition, and i feel like the cups are just coloured-in enough for me to have a go myself. the challenge was the highlight of my monday.
reminiscing: in the week, the lovely paige tweeted sarah and i a couple of snaps and videos that she'd taken from betty's tea party over the weekend, and i really loved the pics she'd taken of us! i usually hate all photos taken of me, because although i've perfected the selfie, and i know how to stand when i take photos of me, as soon as someone else trains a camera on me, i go all chandler bing-like and look like a loon. so to see some nice snaps of me was a refreshing change!
dinner dates: the luscious rosie invited me to dinner at dulwich's newest pop-up restaurant, platform 1 on lordship lane, and i had an awesome time drinking pink wine and eating delicious foods, while having a good old fashioned catch up with someone i really haven't seen in such a long time. (here's a plug for her next popup dinner, where all proceeds will go to help the refugees in calais)
free news, and breakfast club: the nme is free now! and to celebrate, i ate a bacon sandwich.
monochraziness: i have been wearing a lottttt of black of late; not sure when it started, but it started. and now i can't stop. not that it's entirely a bad thing, but i do think it's a bit of a reflection of my current mental state. let's home some time away will bring the colour back out in me, eh?
indian summer: my goodness, wasn't the weekend lovely? no need for a jacket on either day, and a lovely bright morning to wake up lazily too. not one for lots of sun, me (despite the winter sun chasing this weekend in istanbul, of course), but it was a lovely break from the grey, rain and misery london has been subjected to of late.
hairspiration: this time next week i will be a rose-tinted goddess. well, at least my hair will hopefully be a rather dashing shade of rose, for i have booked myself in for a birthday treat with rockalily cuts in shoreditch for the biggest hair transformation of my whole life. well, since i wasn't emo anymore at least. i am so scared, but so excited. i hope it works out as well as i am wishing it does!
and that's this week in a nutshell. i hope to god that yours has been better.
